Cape Town sucks.
This may be a harsh judgment of the bedrock of South African history, but with one reluctant foot on the tip of the continent, its extremities in the water and heart yearning for Europe, this is hardly an African city.
Fuelled by tourist dollars, pounds and euros, it sets itself apart from the rest of the country with a hauteur that is infuriating.
"Oh, but we've got The Mountain," a Capetonian remarked recently when mildly reminded that Durban has good beaches and warmer water. That's part of the trouble. The bloody mountain is whichever way you turn, making a crow's flight trip from Rondebosch to Hout Bay resemble the Great Trek.
The traffic has always been horrendous. But with the city gearing up for the 2010 World Cup and a new public transport system, it has become a nightmare.
Rush "hour" is actually a five-hour daily ordeal, morning and evening. Traffic grinds to a halt, lanes magically disappear. Bowl along in what in any other place would be the fast lane and you come around the corner to discover a 2km bumper-to-bumper line of vehicles waiting to get to an offramp.
The line barely moves because impatient drivers (usually from Bellville) take the middle lane and push their way in.
"Oh hell. We have to go through the Koeberg interchange," I heard more than once. A half hour on the interchange and I knew what locals meant.
Then there's the weather. Cold is one thing, rain is another. Cold and rain together, punctuated by howling gales, make for a hellish winter. After one week in Cape Town spent alternately aquaplaning on busy roads and staying inside to avoid the wind, I returned to Durban very thankful.
Which brings me to another thing.
Why does everyone regard this as the Holy Grail of South African cities? Am I the only person in the world who doesn't want to spend a lot of time there?
"Oh, Anne is the only person who lives in Durban by choice," I once heard someone say.
Then my cousins returned recently from two weeks at an upmarket timeshare, armed with a list that proved Cape Town was better than Durban.
Okay, I agree with some points. Cape Town doesn't have Michael Sutcliffe; the verges are usually clean; and someone does try to fix broken traffic lights and fill potholes.
But the rest of the arguments were specious and they shot themselves in the foot when they admitted that at the restaurants they frequented a glass of wine usually cost at least R50.
Ah yes, the restaurants...
I would venture that, by and large, they are not only characterised by indifferent service, but overpriced and over-hyped grub. Getting an honest meal for your rand is difficult.
It reminds me of that old adage that the better the view, the worse the food.
Which also affects the price of accommodation, permanent or otherwise. If you have a view of the mountain or the sea, you have to have lots of lolly.
Move away from the upper-class areas with their beautiful old trees and commanding outlook, and you get some fairly dreary, dingy suburbs.
"Why, Durban is just like Cape Town was 10 years ago," said one over-made matron at a party. "The Barnyard was full of middle-aged white people and women with teased blond hair."
As opposed to dyed black hair and too much jewellery. I had to bite my tongue.
Why, I don't know. Capetonians are notoriously rude.
The son of a friend, who took me to the Old Biscuit Mill market in Woodstock, later told his mates that he was embarrassed by the "take it or leave it" attitude of the stall holders. A smile was not part of the deal when you bought a loaf of bread.
He remarked, quite rightly, that it was an arrogance that carried over into restaurants and hotels. Nobody has told locals that this is supposed to be the hospitality industry, with the accent on the hospitality part.
Which goes some way towards explaining why domestic tourists opt to go on holiday in Durban, and overseas visitors flock to Cape Town.
Call Durban dirty and crime-ridden, if you like. I'll have it over the Mother City any day.
Responses from readers
I would therefore like to know how this article was vetted and against which criteria it was measured in order to decide the editorial value to the public before allowing it to be published to the rest of the country.
On a lighter note... "That's one more we've got rid of!" More room for us and less people standing in the way of the view!! :-)
Yours Sincerely,
Sean Young
There is much to add to this article: poor service, worse infrastructure, lazy attitude to work (it takes weeks to get e-mail replies), over-hyped pretentiousness, the WORST driving in SA and what takes the absolute cake is the rude attitude most Cape Townians have.
I have lived there for 18 months in the greatest suburbs and hated every moment there. The friendly people you encounter are the semigraters from Gauteng.
Cape Town is filled with people living in an innoculate little bubble who think they're above seeing the trouble in the rest of the country and their slice of "paradise" is so grand. There is nothing redeeming about them. I'd take Gauteng and its crime any day over CT - At least there is a vibrant buzz in the air, not a bunch of people who go to "live the quieter life". Retirement is for when you're in your 60s!
Bravo! Brilliant article.
However, as the article unfolded, I found it to become rather harsh and distasteful. I have lived in Cape Town for 12 years now and having friends in other parts of South Africa who have visited me, I understand that Cape Town is indeed ridiculously expensive. I believe that it is primarily geared towards tourists and their foreign currency. To go out as a local in or around the city becomes a very expensive luxury that the majority of people could not afford.
Saying this, I have to agree, yes, Cape Town is expensive. I also agree with our problem with traffic. Although 5 hours is a bit of an over kill. The fact is, in any city, there is traffic. Deal with it. Over the last 15 years or so, Cape Town has grown tremendiously, with suburbs sprouting up over night. This sudden growth of the surrounding are's of our city, I believe, was not foreseen and infrasturcute was not properly implemented when it should have been.
Saying this, how can anyone base a decision on what they think of a city, after only being here for a week. In case you have forgotten, there are 365 days in a year so your spending 3% of a year here does not do justice the this city what so ever.
In closing, I'd like to say, stop being so bitter. EVERY WHERE you go, in ANY country, is going to have pro's and con's. I'm sure Durban has both.
Regards,
Cynneth Bonanos
If this reporter doesn't like Cape Town then please don't come here. But no IOL decided to publish a nasty article about Cape Town 8 months before possibly the biggest tourism event that this country will see in a long time.
I have lived in Cape Town almost my entire life and this article I take as a personal attack almost. What I find mostly is that people in Cape Town are rude to you when you are rude to them, you make Cape Town what you want it to be and no, restaurant staff are not as useless as this reporter makes them out to be.
If this is what reporting or travel writing has come to please allow me to submit an article about Durban !
I would go as far as asking for an apology to be printed on this page for this article. There is nothing of substance to this story and only this person's personal feelings. Way to go IOL.
I'll be frank. I found the majority of the people in Cape Town quite awful. Rudeness, unfriendliness and laziness are found in abundance in the Cape. I'm inclined to believe that "The Mountain" has some sort of brain-wave altering effect on the local populace, thus making them the way that they are.
As mentioned by the author, service in Cape Town is terrible when compared to other "Mountainless" cities in this country. Another one of my big complaints is the really bad infrastructure: the airport, narrow roads and lack of parking spring to mind.
The comments posted under this article are typically Capetonian in fahion: personal attacks towards "non-believers" and subjective bias towards their beloved city. At least us Joburgers say it like it is. Yes, Jozi is crime-ridden (Cape Town has LOTS of crime too, but the locals conveniently never remember this). Jozi is also a concrete jungle. But what makes a city is its people, and as far as I'm concerned Johannesburg beats Cape Town BY FAR in that regard.
